You can buy a Japanese five-ton robot on Amazon for $ 1.2 million


Great news everyone! You can now buy a five-ton, 3.8-meter, functional piece of metal to fire a BB for as little as A $ 1.2 million.

The future is now.

Image via The edge

The slightly creepy robot – which has actually been on sale since 2013, but started doing rounds online today – features BB guns that fire 6,000 rounds per minute and are controlled by the pilot’s facial expressions. That means you can actually program it to go off when the pilot smiles, which isn’t terrifying at all.

On the plus side, its top speed is only 10 km / h, so the chances of this potential PR nightmare turning into a thug are pretty slim.

To be honest, you hope there is some sort of restriction on who can buy it; again, we’re talking about the company that brought us Unicorn Meat and the Crazy Cat Lady Action Figure.

The robot is a passionate project by a Japanese welder, Kogoro Kurata, and it took several years to complete. Not content with inferior robots such as ASIMO and parent’s nightmare / 90s child status symbol PooChi, the creator of the Mech couldn’t wait for mainstream tech to catch up with his giant robot dreams. Based on the slightly camp cartoon from the 80s, VOTON armored soldiers, an army of these carrier transformers would scare the living crap out of small towns everywhere more than Godzilla ever could.

Kurata mocked people’s concerns in a 2012 interview with The edge: “It’s funny to see panicked emails coming in from people overseas saying they thought it was a joke.”


Image via The edge

In the vein of a typical ’90s toy ad you’d catch for Disney saturday, robot arms (and batteries) are sold separately, but you’ll be happy to know that gift wrap is available. Kurata’s company, Suidobashi Heavy Industry, hopes to mass produce them – so if I were you I’d start saving that spending money.

If you still can’t figure out “Everyone’s Wildest Dream Vehicle,” here’s a handy instructional video they prepared earlier:

Visit the bot on Japan’s Amazon here.

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